Homosexuality: It’s legalization in Kenya, then what?

South Africa, Mali, Congo, Cape Verde, Gabon et al. These African countries have something in common. Homosexuality is legal or decriminalized.

I envy them.

I wish we could borrow their constitutions; the clause on homosexuality would look really good on us. We, the descendants of Moses who went against imposed standards of behavior and gave life to the big elephant in the room, that one of homosexuality.

People in my family don’t talk about it yet it lives right there in the living room together with its extended family.

Assuming the sun sets and rises on a day that will see Kenya legalize homosexuality. That could be anything from tomorrow or the next three hundred decades, but I can only hope it will happen within my allocated human threshold. Gay weddings are beautiful.

I equate homosexuality to the old cliché phrase of “facing reality”.

“Reality is nothing but the sum of all awareness”.

It is many things to the stereotypical society but one thing I know for a fact is that it is going nowhere. If anything, it can only go higher. It is not contagious no. I guess we were just left behind when every kid went to Sunday school. But hey, a lot of fun happens behind the scenes. Ask our gay brothers. 

How can our society program its mind to the awareness of learning to accept two adults of the same sex living together permanently without prejudice and half baked facts, Without making assumptions that we will “rub it” on their kids?  

It is upsetting to hear and read news after news of corrective lesbian rape, murder and discrimination to the LGBTI community. I have seen an extremely ignorant society growing up where people with a disease as manageable as HIV/AIDs are treated so unfairly it is heartbreaking.

It is this same society that attack homosexuals on social media day in day out. People have made it their responsibility to teach us how to live “normal” lives. They delight in hurting our feelings to satisfy their egos. A piece of cloth as tiny as a tie for example will make people become too dramatic and to fit in and relate to them, we are made to believe in the heterosexual doctrine. Never mind that many of these preachers are closet homosexuals.  


How possible is it for this society to live with us like brothers and sisters? Are we part of their greater whole? How long until they make our existence possible? How many landlords out there will order us to evacuate their buildings because we look and dress weird? The hate can kill us, just as effectively as by bombs.

With all these in mind, a reader asked me a very important question. I quote, “if being a dyke was made legal in Kenya-what would happen? How fast would we crawl out of the woodwork?”

Side note: She is gay, beautiful, famous, and married. Sorry girls.

Confidence comes not from thin air, but from experiences in which we succeed. Consistent success in small and large matters creates a new confidence in us. We start by hugging our partners publicly, then we hold hands and eventually we get to kissing them openly.

Once we get the pass, will it be a case of getting freedom and not knowing what to do with it? What of all the work our LGBTI activists have done; the thousands of articles and forums created in our plea.

There will be no more asylums, you will do whatever you had desired to do in SA with your partner right here in Kenya, in front of your folks and clansmen.

So how long will it take before you proudly parade your partner in a wedding? Are you ready to become an instant celebrity and give the media a field day?

Personally, I am so accustomed to being a hermit so much so, that even when the victory comes, I will still be in the battlefield singing war songs. I am not suggesting that we should all chicken out from publicly stating our sexual orientation to all Dick and Harry; it is just that for me, it may take years.

Our immediate environments for instance has made it possible for some to come out to family and friends, while for others, sobibor is a place we aren’t planning to escape soon. Not because we hate the freedom that comes with being openly gay, but for me, it safer to live in the closet rather than give father an early death. I would never forgive myself. He is everything I have and all things considered, it is a sacrifice worth making.

What about you, if the constitution allowed homosexuality today, would you publicly marry your partner? Or to quote her again, how long before you come out of the woodwork?



6 thoughts on “Homosexuality: It’s legalization in Kenya, then what?

  1. Teeny Bikini says:

    I love your perspective. I wish you only good things – equality is certainly among them. Personally, you couldn’t pay me to get married. Okay, maybe… if he can fix things in the house *and* is very quiet *and* can wash my hair and um… my car – but that’s all. I have a short – yet very important – list 😉 Stay fabulous, Miss.


  2. […] Homosexuality: It’s legalization in Kenya, then what? (queerkenyangirl.wordpress.com) […]


  3. […] Homosexuality: It’s legalization in Kenya, then what? (queerkenyangirl.wordpress.com) […]


  4. calashmere nnandwa says:

    I’d rather live as a hermit than have pple in my hometown give me an early send off plus am still lesbian whether quiet about it or outspoken does not make much of a difference
    Its ironical how parents want you to lead a’ normal’ life yet they taught me nothing about sex and men stuff
    It also reminds me that pple find me wierd coz I clad bowties,caps or sneakers they think am a shame to womanity and all but I give a damn about it and ooh I really hope Kenya doesn’t bcome homophobic like UG


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